We’re back. Long hailed for our superior editorial wit and marginally funny quotes (or was it vice-versa) we here at “Quotes of the Day” have been out of the public eye for far too long. And so today we reemerge into the cutthroat world of posting quotes culled from our crack staffs daily lives online. There aren’t a whole lot of websites that do this and maintain the same high standards and practices that we do, but hey we’re just that good. So please sit back, crack up, and enjoy the newly returned “QUOTES OF THE DAY.”
-Adam Conner
“Quotes of the Day” Editor-In-Chief and Founder
Adam: you miss the thrill of the chase my friend
Adam: the call of the wild
Matt: haha yes yes i do
Adam: You’re like a lion who has a ton of meat in his freezer back in the cave (or wherever the fuck lions live, you’re the Africa expert) and yet you still go out and hunt the gazelle
-Matt E. and Adam Conner discussing the primitive thrill of the hunt that dwells deep within all of us.
Auto response from Erica: you'd think writing about Machiavelli is terrible... then you get referenced as meat in a freezer!
-An angry away message from Erica…I don’t quite know why though.
Matt: well my friend...you see Africa is filled with many gazelles....frolicking across the open planes unexpecting of the lion just waiting to pounce on them and eat them
-Matt E. explaining the survival dynamics of the Circle of Life in the African Serengeti
Adam (1:29:41 AM): I have another costume suggestion
Adam (1:29:43 AM): a gazelle
Erica (1:29:51 AM): and fuck you for the gazelle
Adam (1:29:59 AM): you know you weren’t actually the gazelle
Adam (1:30:04 AM): what if you’d been more exotic meats?
Adam (1:30:07 AM): like
Adam (1:30:11 AM): like
Adam (1:30:28 AM): a Zebra
Erica (1:30:49 AM): I’m in the freezer
Erica (1:30:57 AM): and he's out looking for gazelles
Erica (1:31:04 AM): how come I don’t get to go out looking for some lions?
Adam (1:31:15 AM): are you saying you want to be eaten?
Adam (1:31:29 AM): or what if
Adam (1:31:35 AM): we bring the analogy of the hunter into this
Erica (1:31:57 AM): I don’t want to be eaten
Erica (1:32:05 AM): I’m saying if he's gonna go find gazelles
Erica (1:32:09 AM): I’m gonna go find me some apes
Erica (1:32:16 AM): I’m no meat in the freezer
Adam (1:32:40 AM): apes?
Adam (1:32:46 AM): apes eat bananas
Erica (1:33:00 AM): the apes aren't going to EAT me
Erica (1:33:07 AM): he's hunting gazelles
Erica (1:33:10 AM): I get to hunt too!
Adam (1:33:51 AM): ...I think we need to rework this analogy
-Erica Finkle and Adam Conner discussing hammering out analogy specifics
Lucrece: So I told my mom that my friend was a man now
Lucrece: And her response was "what? does he yell out "a la verga" during sex?"
-Lucrece Borrego describing a mutual friend of ours from High School and his ascent into manhood…hilarious of course.
Lucrece: Speaking of sex
Adam: Yes?
Lucrece: I met this kid who was telling me that he gets too much ass and that he is sick of girls throwing themselves at him and it just isn't fun anymore
Lucrece: It was ridiculous!
Adam: Kill him
Adam: You have my permission
Lucrece: I'll let him know
Adam: Seriously WTF
Lucrece: He was like "ya, this weekend these two girls wanted me to hook up with them at the same time, but it was just the same old shit, boring"
Lucrece: The thing is, he's cute, but he's not craaazy hot
Lucrece: And thus my conclusion that girls are way too easy and our ruining it for everyone- you saturate the market and the price goes down
-Lucrece Borrego describing one of those men who ruin it for the rest of us. Bastards got a lock on the market and doesn’t appreciate what he apparently has.
Erica: "You know what I think of Clinton. He's like that cool substitute teacher that took the place of our real one for a few months back in elementary school. He gave us laughs, no homework, and brought us enough candy to shut us up for a lengthy period of time. And then mean old Bush came back. Damn mean old Bush..."
-Erica Finkle quoting someone on the lost sentiment we all have towards the good old Clinton years. Stock markets kicked major ass when they only went up.
Lucrece: You are a fuckin badass
Lucrece: I am proud to be your friend
-Lucrece Borrego with another random, but cool, comment about me.
Ed: rum is good stuff
Ed: my mother collects it
Ed: well not really collects, but drinks a lot of it from different places
-Ed Stautberg on his mothers collecting habits.
Lindsay: Dress sharp, be funny and perverted
Adam: I am all of the above to be honest
Lindsay: I know
-Lindsay Benjamin on how I should try and pick up chicks.
Travis: yeah I know your jellious
Adam: especially of your spelling
Travis: hey, thats why the invinted spell checer
-Travis Zander’s instant messenger conversation with Adam Conner. The spelling has not been changed at all.
Ryan: My friend on not being able to end relationships:
“I’m shitty at that, ill have like 5 girls come to our parties all thinking they are the ones, I solve the problem by drinking till I can’t see.”
-Ryan McGlone on his friends advice on how to deal with girls.
im sooooooooo dRUNK.....................where are you..in vIRGINMA.....im such a dork im imming u across the wroom.......but ur not really there so its all good......
-Ryan McGlone’s drunk instant message to my away message when I was at a conference in Bumfuck, Virginia.
Auto Response from Adam: In Bumfuck, Virginia.
Kyle: Are you gonna fuck some bums in Bumfuck, VA?
Kyle: Cuz that would make sense...
-Kyle Commenting on my possible activities in Virginia due to my away message description
Ryan: There's more pressure there then in both of my back tires!
-Ryan McGlone pointing to a busty lass on TV and declaring.
Kyle: Dude
Kyle: I went clubbing last night in Seattle
Kyle: ...and Sir-Mix-Alot (a Seattle native) was there, and he hosted an ass shaking contest for the ladies
-Kyle F. describing what had to be a truly seminal moment in his life
Tommie: Hey this needs to be a shirt
Tommie: "Friends don't let friends go to Texas"
Tommie: And "Texas..... the Manifest Destiny gone wrong"
Tommie: If I can spread the word... then that's one person closer to a perfect texas free world
-Tommie Begay with some truly FANTASTIC tshirt ideas. BTW fuck Texas.
Adam: Dude we need to do semester at sea!
Chris: That’d be awesome!
Chris: I wonder how much beer we can bring on board?
Adam: Could we make our beds on top of cases of beer?
-Chris Miller and Adam Conner discussing future study abroad plans on a boat with alcohol while tanked on a way to the club.
Adam: I miss the ghetto.
Matt: hahahaha you've never lived in the ghetto
Adam: i beg to differ
Adam: NM ranks first in all the bad stuff and last in all the good stuff
Matt: hahaha suks for you
-Matt E. and Adam Conner discussing Adam’s ghetto heritage.
Adam: Can you believe China is sending a man into space?
Ryan: With what? A stepladder?
-Ryan McGlone and Adam Conner speculating on the future of the Chinese manned space exploration program.
Yeah one made out of rope and bamboo.
-Matt E. commenting on the earlier Chinese stepladder to space comment and expressing similar distrust of the Chinese space program.
"Well see some little kids aren’t potty trained so clearly we cant let them go swimming in the gene pool."
-Some fucking tool in my incredibly useless "History of Nature Nurture debate class" commenting on natural selection. SHUT THE FUCK UP.
RESPECT THE BONCH!
-Kyle F.'s BONCHtacular away message.
Adam: Have you respected the BONCH today?
Kyle: Dude I am in a constant state of BONCH respecting.
-Kyle F. and Adam Conner on his perpetual state of BONCH respecting.
Kid 1: I saw some dude with a Lazio sticker one time in high school during a debate tournament. Man what a fucking choda.
Kid 2: I love the reference to a US Senatorial Candidate and penis that is wider then it is longer in the same sentance.
Adam: Only at GW.
-2 kids in my Strategic Political Communication Class discussing the FAILED attempt by Rick Lazio to get elected. Tool. Funny penis reference too.
Bonch to the double bonch, bro
-Kyle F. with another masterful BONCH comment
